Ladies and Gentlemen, Your Section E Winners!

#1 Seinfeld vs. #16 Benson

While it wasn’t a rout, the all-time ’90s classic sitcom about nothing was the master of its own domain–and also won this round. Jerry, Elaine, George, and Kramer (and Newman, Frank, Uncle Lou, the Soup Nazi, Babu Bhatt, Dolores, Tim Whatley, etc.) move on to the Round of 64 where it has a very tough match-up against…

#8 Police Squad vs. #9 Absolutely Fabulous

Edina and Patsy get drunk and just barely elude the web of Det. Frank Drebin of Police Squad (In Color!) to earn their tickets! money! passports! into the second round to take part of a matchup between objectively reprihensible people who are oh so fun to watch.

#2 New Girl vs. #15 Reno 911!

This battle between two very different shows and sets of friends wound up being more contentious than expected as the bumbling cops of Reno 911!–the folks who taught you that you should not put a cassette tape in a baby–won decisively over at GBOAT, but New Girl took the day by an even wider margin here and ultimately it was not that close. But, really, could we have sent Winston and Ferguson home so early. Just look at them!

#7 Flight of the Conchords vs. #10 Kids in the Hall

They were so young once, eh? The composers of such classics as “Rhymenocerous vs. Hiphopopotomus” and “The Most Beautiful Girl in the Room” lose out to the creator of “Daves I Know” in the battle of obtuse humor. It’s a close race, but as I said on GBOAT, cue the Shadowy Men on a Shadowy Planet…

#3 Bob’s Burgers vs. #14 Mork & Mindy

On one hand “ALRIIIIIIGHT!!!” On the other, “Shazbat!” The current king of holiday episodes and–as observed by many on GBOAT–one of the funniest shows on television, period, prevails fairly easily and sends our Boulder, Colorado, alien back to Ork. Bob’s Burgers moves on to the Round of 64 where we will have a heartbreaking choice between long-running animated shows…

#6 King of the Hill vs. #11 Search Party

OK, this one is right in the name. The residents of fictional Arlen, Texas, get a win against those NYC neurotics who are always trying to find one another only to lose them again. So, it’s Tom Landry Middle School facing off against Wagstaff School for the… right to go on to another round. By the way, Mike Judge-related shows are now 3-0 in this tournament. We’ll see if it’s a sweep when we exit the Buttheadverse…

#4 Last Week Tonight with John Oliver vs. #13 Maude

Phone call for Mr. Oliver! Phone call for Mr. Oliver! In the battle for the heart of liberalism, the 2010s beat out the 1970s as the faux news deep dives of Daily Show (and British) ex-pat win a very close battle over Archie Bunker’s outspoken cousin. It might be a pyrrhic victory, however, as look who it faces in the following round…

#5 The Golden Girls vs. #12 Drunk History

Derek Waters and his cast of historical characters performing the drunken monologues of his semi-famous friends never had a chance up against what could be a dark horse to win the whole thing. I mean, how can you vote against those three fancy Miami couchsitters up there. What if I told you they were supposed to be in their early 50s? Still no? Well, good luck Mr. Oliver.

And thank y’all for being friends. Look out for the combatants of Section F tomorrow!

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