It’s very much thrills, chills, and spills today as a pair of promising new thrillers debut, one which takes place in the polar freeze, Al Davis is given the ESPN bio treatment and we know his Raiders gave all three of those, and the four most famous friendly pranksters return and will most certainly fall at one point. Ok, we’re stretching for a relatively weak premise again. But that’s how we roll. When someone says to us “that’s just lazy writing,” we say “you’re welcome.” Here’s our picks for Thursday TV.

KATHERINE’S PICK:
The Murders [Sundance Now]
This Canadian cop drama–yep, even after *gestures wildly* all the progress we’ve allegedly made, they’re still made–comes to the U.S. through Sundance’s streaming platform. A rookie homicide detective in Vancouver seeks redemption through her work following her partner’s death as the result of her own negligence.

BRAD’S PICK:
Impractical Jokers [TruTV, 10p]
Well America the impractical jokers gang are back. There is definitely a charming every guy angle to these guys and these day a we can use harmless escapism. For what it’s worth they are less douchy than tosh.0 and ridiculousness..

JASON’S PICK:
30 For 30: Al Davis vs. the NFL [ESPN, 9p]
As a kid, I despised Al Davis and his obnoxious posturing, city hopping, and slicked back hair way more than was healthy and it was especially satisfying when I got to watch my Buffalo Bills in person as they demolished his dirty hit loving Raiders 51-3 in the 1990 AFC Championship. As an adult, I’ve come to appreciate him as an iconic figure (and a fascinating one at that) whose “just win, baby” is as integral to NFL lore as steroids and concussions. I’m actually pretty excited to watch him get the ESPN 30 For 30 treatment tonight. 

BUT, WAIT, THERE’S MORE:

• It’s shades of Ice Station Zebra and (more accurately) The Thing–with just a twist of Rashomon–as a reconaissance crew to a polar setting finds two survivors of a team of scientists who have otherwise been murdered on The Head, new on HBO Max.
• Deeper into the horror side of thriller, Shudder’s latest, A Nightmare Wakes hearkens back to the earliest days of the genre, telling the creepy true tale of the Shelleys as Mary writes Frankenstein, purportedly egged on by a ghost story session with her husband Percy and Lord Byron.
• For those of you that think the History Channel’s mission has been compromised, we ask you, don’t Swamp People deserve to have their history told too? For shame! It’s 12th season starts tonight.

• For the briliantly titled Fast Foodies on TruTV, chefs compete to craft gourmet versions of fast food staples like Popeye’s Spicy Chicken Sandwich or Taco Bell’s Chalupa Supreme to feed to popular comedians like Ron Funches and Bobby Lee. Has anyone told The Doughboys?
• Pooch groomers get the reality competition treatment on Haute Dog, where puppies are sculpted into works of art by the greatest in their field, returns for a second season on HBO Max.
• Those saboteurs of all that’s good in love and the world return on Lifetime with Married at First Sight: Australia and Married at First Sight: Couples Cam and that’s about all we have to say about that as we have to take a long, long shower of sadness, then watch a bunch of Peanuts cartoons. Good night.