Crank 2: High Voltage [IFC, 8p]
No, I’m not endorsing this adrenaline-fueled Jason Statham romp on its own merit – although it is a sight to behold. I’m suggesting watching it, then tuning into this podcast with three hilarious comedians and one Jensen Karp (as pictured above) making laughs and pondering how it indeed got made.
Crimson Peak [Cinemax, 8p]
Last summer’s Victorian-era thriller stars Mia Wasikowska as a young woman being gaslit by a weird, incestuous pair determined to get their hands on her inheritance. Guillermo del Toro’s ghost movie is scary, feminist, and underrated.
Millionaire Matchmaker [WEtv, 10p]
New channel but hopefully same tough loving Patti whipping singles into shape and giving therapy on why they haven’t found love, until now.
ALSO ON TAP TONIGHT:
- The mystery of Syfy’s Dark Matter is made all the more mysterious by how relatively little it is pushed on the internet. It’s a wonderful premise though, a space crew that knows not who they are or what they are doing (if you want a similar idea done terrestrially, check out the unfortunately short-lived Persons Unknown), and in its second season, so easily devourable should you watch it and want to plan a bingeathon.
- Girl Meets World is still going strong on the Disney Channel, and tonight’s episode brings us a classic sitcom plot of kids lying to their parents to do something cool, however rarely have those parents also once been TV kids. Freaky!
- Today’s cookie (ahem, sorry, biscuit) challenges on PBS’ The Great British Baking Show include biscotti and puff pastry.
- Spike is apparently marathoning COPS, which seems a bit opportunistic, taking the sadness to a whole new level.